


A Sea of Monsters

by longlostlove



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: AU-Bullys aren't bullys, College, F/M, Heartache, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-06
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-19 02:35:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14227242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/longlostlove/pseuds/longlostlove
Summary: "Maybe you are gay.”He never noticed how women never gave him butterflies. Women never made him blush. Women never gave him that fiery feeling in the pit of his stomach. But he knew who did.





	1. Talk!

Eddie had a normal life, some would say he had a wonderful life. To Eddie, he always felt that there was something missing. He tried not to think of it often because Betty would notice and ask him questions. That is the last thing Eddie wanted because he didn’t like lying to Betty. Eddie and Betty have been together since they were sophomores in High School and now they are juniors in College and living together. Eddie thought about popping the question multiple times but he just couldn’t. Betty is a beautiful and loving woman, opposite of his mother, and that is what Eddie liked about her. 

They lived in a small apartment right off campus. Betty didn’t really like how far she was from her friends and tried to get Eddie to live further away from campus but he wouldn’t budge. Eddie wanted to be close to school and his friends. Richie and Beverly lived about 10 minutes from campus and Eddie loved that. In the warm months Eddie could bike to their place and have a study session or homework session and be home in time for dinner with Betty. With Eddie being over at his friend’s she could use his car to drive out to her friends. It was a win-win in the end.

One Monday night while they were watching The Bachelor, Betty was acting different and Eddie noticed. He wasn’t sure what was wrong but left her alone. Betty didn’t talk to him all evening, so Eddie thought it would be best if he left her alone because that is what she preferred when she was having an off day. Eddie was texting Richie and was trying not to laugh at some of his jokes. His jokes have gotten better over the years but Eddie didn’t want to admit to that to him. While texting Richie, Eddie fell asleep on the love seat with his phone on his stomach. Betty stood up and walked over to wake him up so he could go to bed but then his phone vibrated. Betty couldn’t help herself and picked the phone up slowly so she wouldn’t wake Eddie up. 

_Richie: So, since Betty isn’t talking to you, do ya wanna come over? I won’t ignore you Eds ;)_  
Richie: Did you fall asleep on me?  
Richie: Well goodnight sweetheart. Sweet dreams. :*  


While Betty read the last text, Eddie woke up. His face twisted when he noticed she had his phone.

“Why do you have my phone Betty?” He snapped while he came to his feet.

“I-I-I was checking the time.” Betty couldn’t look Eddie in the eyes.

“Don’t lie to me Betty." Eddie spoke through clenched teeth. " Do you think that I am cheating on you?! Is that why you are taking my phone while I am sleeping?” Eddie hissed as he stepped closer to Betty and didn’t break eye-contact.

“N-n-no, I don’t think that! I do think that you don’t know what you want!” She rebuked as Eddie snatched his phone back.

“If you are going to let your friends tell you that I’m cheating on you then I don’t think we should be together!” Eddie turned away and Betty’s heart broke.

“They don’t think that you are cheating on me Eddie!" Betty bit her lip, "They think you are gay!” Betty noticed that Eddie became stiff and stepped closer to reach out to place a hand on his shoulder.

“Gay?” He whispered to himself.

“Maybe you should just face the truth Eddie. Maybe you are gay.” Betty lifted her hand off Eddie and walked out of their apartment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eddie was laying down on his couch and looking around at the half empty apartment. He noticed all the things that weren’t there and it made him shutter. He noticed the song that was playing and sung along.

__  
“And I’ve been thinking lots about your mouth  
A conversation superseded by the way he talks  
I’d be an anchor but I’m scared you’d drown  
It’s safer on the ground”  


It has been a month since Betty left and Eddie missed the company. He wasn’t ready to talk to anyone about what happened. He wasn’t sure about anything anymore. _Am I gay?_ This was the only thought in Eddie’s mind for the last month. He never meant to hurt her. She could have anyone she wanted but she chose Eddie; **She chose wrong.** He was not in love with her. She knew that there was a special person for Eddie but she knew it was not her. Betty’s last words were resonating in his head.

__  
“Maybe you should just face the truth Eddie.  
Maybe you are gay.”  


Before she broke up with him, he never noticed how women never gave him butterflies. Women never made him blush. Women never gave him that fiery feeling in the pit of his stomach. But he knew who did. Eddie thought he was such a fool for not noticing earlier. He always felt this way around one person for as long as he could remember. He knew that person could not feel the same way about him.

He did not know how to tell his friends about the breakup and about him thinking he was gay. He knew they would be very understanding and supportive but he was still afraid. Coming out is hard to do in a little town in Maine, even when same sex marriage is legal. One person can let something slip out of their mouth and in the next hour everyone in town knows. That is the scary fact about living in Derry, everyone knows everyone. Why would he risk this if he wasn’t absolutely sure about it?

Eddie was drug out of his thoughts by a familiar ring tone. He thought about not answering but he was alone for long enough.

“How may I help you?” Eddie answered his friend sounding ruder than he meant but shrugged it off.

“You can help me by coming over and keeping me company Eddie Spaghetti.” Eddie was caught off guard with Richie’s slurred speech and his one-liner. 

Eddie dismissed his answer and spoke firmly. “It’s late. And that is not my name!”

“Late? Eds it’s like eleven. Come on over and get drunk with me! I’m having a party!” Richie tried to persuade Eddie. 

Eddie contemplated but he didn’t like getting drunk, so he thought fast. “I have plans Richie.” Was all Eddie thought to say.

“You haven’t had any plans since you got dumped by Betty! Come on!” Richie felt like Eddie needed to loosen up a bit and this was the way since he would never touch a cigarette.

“Richie, you don’t have to be a dick and rub salt in the wound! I don’t have time to deal with you.” Eddie went to hang up but stopped when he heard Richie yell.

“That is bullshit Kaspbrak! You are staying home and sulking on your living room floor, I know you Eddie,” with that Richie hung up with a huff.

Eddie couldn’t believe Richie would say those things. He didn’t understand why Richie couldn’t leave him alone. He just wanted to be alone with his thoughts and figure everything out. Eddie stretched back out on his couch, turned up his music and soon he drifted into a deep sleep.

_  
All Eddie could see was Richie walking next to him and nothing else. It was pitch black and he was holding onto Richie’s hand tightly as to not let him go. He wasn’t sure where they were but he felt like he needed to protect Richie. He wasn’t sure why he felt this way because Richie had the biggest smile on his face and was telling his horrible jokes like normal. Eddie kept looking around for a hint to as where they were. As soon as Eddie turned back, Richie was gone. The ghost of his touch was still there teasing him. He heard Richie screaming and in the distance, he saw the well from beneath the house on Niebolt street. Eddie ran as fast as he could to the well and when he got there he looked over into the deep abyss. At first, he didn’t see anything and then his eyes adjusted to the dark and saw Richie hanging there with his mouth sewn shut._

_“Richie!” he screamed as he grabbed for Richie’s hands and found them._

_Eddie felt his hands getting slicker and knew he couldn’t keep ahold of Richie’s hands much longer. Tears stained Eddie’s face while Richie’s eyes pleaded for him to save him._

_As Eddie whispered, “I love you Richie,” Richie’s hands slipped through his fingers and Richie was gone.  
_

Eddie shot straight up out of his reoccurring nightmare in a sweat and a coughing fit. He slung his feet off the couch and reached for his inhaler on the coffee table. He sucked his medicine in and counted to ten and let his breath out. Eddie grabbed for his bottle of water and gulped the rest of it down.

He found his phone between his couch cushions and looked at the time. It was 1:45 a.m. and Eddie wasn’t going back to sleep any time soon. He unlocked his phone and noticed that he had a missed call and a voicemail. Eddie brought his phone up to his ear and listened to a very drunk and very sorry Richie.

“Hey Eddie Spaghetti! It’s me Trashmouth! I’m sorry about what I said earlier. You should come over when you’re done with your plans because I would love to see that cute face.”  
Richie was slurring his words and Eddie couldn’t get the big smile off his face. 

Richie made him feel like he could do anything he put his mind to. Richie left him this voicemail about an hour ago and wondered if the party was still alive and thriving. Eddie closed out of Facebook and dialed a familiar phone number.

“Hey Eddie!” the sweet voice on the other end exclaimed.

“Hello Bev. Are you at Richie’s?” Eddie asked trying not to sound so eager.

“Um…yes! Can you not hear how great this party is? Are you going to join us? Richie said he will make it up to you, for earlier,” Beverly gushed.

“I was thinking about it, but I’m not sure. The party should be dying down any time now,” Eddie stuttered. 

“Oh, come on Eddie, it isn’t too late for a Tozier party, you know that! The party has just started!” Beverly exclaimed. 

Eddie knew she was telling the truth and he gave in. “Okay, I will be there in about thirty minutes.” He sighed and made his way to the bathroom.

Eddie undressed and stepped into the shower, hoping this will make him feel a little better before seeing Richie. As he was going through the motions, he remember how Richie looked this past Summer. He remembered Richie bragging about being on his college soccer team and the intense workouts they have. Eddie started to feel light-headed and as he peered down he understood why. 

His face twisted, “What is wrong with me?” he breathed. 

He then quickly finished his shower and got ready for the night. As he looked in his mirror he was pleased with his outfit and made his way to his little Nissan Leaf. Eddie quickly unplugged his car and headed to Richie’s apartment a few minutes away.


	2. Love Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He was lost in the song and his hands were all over Patrick’s body. He liked how he felt as the music surrounded him. He felt like no one else was there but he and Patrick. He felt free. He liked being himself. He liked the way it felt when Patrick touched him as they danced. The song faded into a slow song and Eddie felt a tap on his shoulder.

When Eddie arrived at Richie’s apartment building, he took a deep breath and got out of the car. Eddie climbed the stairs at a steady pace so he wouldn’t need his inhaler. As Eddie closed in on Richie’s apartment door he could hear the music getting louder. Eddie thought about turning around and going back home. He could make up an excuse for why he didn’t show up. He then found himself staring at a familiar black painted door. In the hope that the door was unlocked, Eddie reached for the knob and to his luck it turned and he pushed himself into the crowded apartment. 

There was a flood of unfamiliar faces having a great time. Eddie headed for the kitchen after searching the faces and not finding his friends. He peered into the freezer and got the bottle of tequila out.  
“Here’s to me. Finally, out of my apartment.” Eddie whispered to himself and downed his first shot of the night.  
Eddie leaned back against the counter and searched the crowd again, but he didn’t have any more luck finding his friends. Eddie shrugged it off as he turned to pour him another shot.  
“Can you pour me one too, please?” a honeyed voice spoke into his ear.  
Eddie wasn’t sure who it was, but he did as they said. He spun around and handed this stranger his shot and Eddie tapped his shot with theirs.  
“Hocksetter, Patrick Hocksetter. You?” He purred while taking a step closer.  
“Edward Kaspbrak,” he gulped, “but I prefer Eddie.” He stuck his hand out for Patrick to shake.

Patrick took Eddie’s hand in his and brought it up to his soft lips. Eddie was in a trance and couldn’t look away from Patrick’s eyes. Eddie couldn’t believe that _the_ Patrick Hocksetter was talking to him. Patrick Hocksetter was the captain of the soccer team and the lead in all the plays and musicals at the college. Eddie was _just_ Eddie. He wasn’t popular at all, he mostly stayed to himself. Patrick was wearing black high-top converse, black leather pants that clung to his ass perfectly, a white V-neck shirt, and a black leather jacket tailored to fit his slim physic. Eddie was complete opposite. He was wearing a salmon colored polo shirt, slim navy-blue pants, and salmon colored slip on Vans. Eddie peeled his eyes away and offered another shot as he asked about his upcoming musical, Anastasia. Eddie liked that he was having a good time at a party, for once. He was having a good time without Richie. Eddie felt free.

Four shots later, Eddie had the balls to ask Patrick for his number and he gladly gave it to Eddie with a wink. Patrick had stepped away to use the bathroom. This gave Eddie another opportunity to find his friends and this time his eyes caught fiery red hair and piercing blue eyes. Beverly. She glanced his way and she smiled ear to ear and pushed her way towards the kitchen. Eddie started to walk towards her but was stopped in his tracks with someone else’s hands covering his eyes.

“Guess who!” a slurry but great British accent reached Eddie’s ears.  
“Hmm…well I don’t know anyone from England. I really have no idea,” Eddie giggled, he was surly drunk.  
“I think you know one fellow.” The mystery person whispered into Eddie’s ear.

Eddie grabbed the hands and felt the cool metal that wrapped around bony fingers. He felt the leather that wrapped around their wrists. As soon as he did that he knew who it was. Richie. Eddie quickly spun around and faced his best friend. Both men were smiling ear to ear like they haven’t seen each other in years. Liquor was a hell of a thing. Bev grabbed their necks and pulled them into her and held them there. She missed Eddie and she knew Richie missed him too. As they escaped Beverly’s grasp they were both thinking the same thing and headed for the kitchen.

“So Eds, it looks like you are having a good time. How much have you had?” Richie tried his best to not slur his words, he stood up straight as he tried to sound like an adult.  
“Like 5 or 6, Mom.” Eddie rolled his eyes and giggled.  
“Sounds like you found my replacement, Kaspbrak.” Patrick teased as he walked up to Eddie with a grin and put his arm around his waist.  
“Hello Patrick.” Richie mumbled and drank straight from a bottle of vodka.  
“Thanks for keeping Eddie company while I used the little boys room. But we are going to dance, aren’t we sweetheart?” Patrick pulled Eddie out to the living room while he winked at Richie.  
"Sorry Rich" This is all Eddie could get out.

Eddie managed to get his mind off Richie.

_"And love me (Yeah, oh)_  
If that's what you wanna do (Oh, yeah)  
And love me (Love me, yeah)  
If that's what you wanna do (Oh, yeah)" 

He was lost in the song and his hands were all over Patrick’s body. He liked how he felt as the music surrounded him. He felt like no one else was there but he and Patrick. He felt free. He liked being himself. He liked the way it felt when Patrick touched him as they danced. The song faded into a slow song and Eddie felt a tap on his shoulder.

“Do you care if I cut in?” Bev asked as she pulled Eddie from Patrick’s grasp.  
“I would love to dance with a beautiful woman like you Bev.” Giggled Eddie.  
“Eds, you are totally drunk honey.” Bev laughed.

Eddie leaned his head on Beverly’s shoulder and Beverly held him close like a mother held her newborn baby. Eddie felt love. He knew Bev loved him and he loved her. Before Eddie knew what was happening Bev was wiping a tear from his eye and he started crying harder. He wasn’t sure why he was crying but his chest started burning.

“Shhhhh. It's okay Eddie. I'm here. I am not going anywhere." Beverly was running her fingers through his hair and then he started wheezing.  
"Eddie where is your inhaler?” Beverly was trying to stay calm.  
As Beverly was checking his pockets Patrick walked up and gave Eddie his inhaler.  
“There you go honey.” Patrick turned to Bev and whispered “He asked me to hold it since I had bigger pockets. What happened? Is everything alright?”  
“I think he drank too much.” She stated.  
“I can take you home Eddie, if you want me to.” Patrick turned to Eddie and held his hands.  
“That won’t be necessary fine gentleman. There is a spare bed here, in my apartment.” Richie insisted as he noticed Eddie's hands in Patrick's.  
“Uh…” Eddie got cut off.  
“Why would he stay here when he could go home and sleep in his own warm cozy bed?” Patrick stepped up to Richie and Richie stood his ground.  
“He would be cared for better here with his friends, that’s why.” Richie spat.  
“Guys, can you not do this please? I am fine.” Eddie took a deep breath in and out. “See, look, I am breathing and alive.” He stepped between the men and they both looked at him.  
Eddie turned to Patrick “Thank you for giving me my inhaler and thank you for worrying about me.” He sighed. “But Richie is right. I am better off here with him and Beverly.”  
“Fine, I will respect that, but don’t hesitate to call me if you need me.” He winked and kissed his cheek and walked through the crowd and out the door.  
“Richie, can you tell everyone to leave?” Bev asked while walking Eddie to the spare room.

“Of course, m ’lady.” Richie bowed and turned to the crowd.  
“ALRIGHT BITCHES, THE PARTY IS OVER!” Richie yelled into his living room at all the blurred faces.

Richie waltzed over to his kitchen while the crowd diminished. He took the vodka out of the freezer and took a chug. He fished his phone out of his pocket and looked at his text messages: 

_Mom: Richie, I love you so much baby. I hate that you don’t call me. Your father misses you. Call us soon baby._  


Richie sighed and took a long sip of vodka while his eyes started to tear up. 

Beverly stumbled into the kitchen rubbing her eyes.  
“Richie, what are you doing!” Beverly snatched the bottle out of his hand. “You have drank enough!”  
“Bev, I can’t deal with it anymore.” Richie sobbed. “I don’t want to be like her, I hate her!”  
“Just breathe sweetheart. That’s all you have to do.” Richie collapsed into her arms crying into her chest. “Let’s stand up and go to the balcony, okay?”  
Richie nodded. “Do you have any cigarettes? I ran out.”  
“Of course, sir, anything for you.” Beverly pulled out her Camel Crushes and handed one over to him.

As they came to the railing of the balcony Richie quickly lit his cigarette. The air was cold on his damp face as he was looking out into the early morning sky.  
“Hey Bev?” Richie looked into her eyes.  
“Yeah, Rich?” Beverly asked.  
“Don’t kill me, okay.” Richie stated.  
“Okay…” Beverly raised an eyebrow.  
Richie kept eye contact and moved closer to Bev. He leaned down and closed his eyes. He felt his lips touch hers. Her lips had a waxy feel to them it must be the lipstick that wore off a bit throughout the night. Richie pulled back and opened his eyes. He wasn’t sure how he felt about Beverly or about the kiss.  
“What the fuck, Rich!?” Beverly demanded quietly and then walked back into the apartment to check on Eddie.  
As Beverly stepped inside, the front door slammed shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, well I hope you all are enjoying this! I love where I am taking this! I want to hear how you guys feel about everything that happened! I know it is taking a while to get the ball rolling but I hope you enjoyed this! Again this is posted on inhaling-reddie.tumblr.com don't be scared to talk to me on there or follow me, let me know and I will follow back for sure! Thanks again! -Gabby


End file.
